We all have loved ones who can’t be with us at special times, for one reason or another, but there are a whole host of lovely and unique ways to make sure that they are with you in spirit and memory if not in actual person. Your wedding is an important and significant time, when you need and want important people in your life to be there to support and guide you, whether in a private or a public way. If someone has played an important role in your life but is no longer with you, you may want to remember and honor them on your special day, without dampening the mood, which although will likely be fairly emotional, should also be happy and exciting!
Here are a few ideas to help you to feel the presence of loved ones even in their absence:-
- Notes or a video from them – if loved ones cannot make it to the wedding, many show videos or have words read out during the speeches.
- Read out some of their words – recently a Father of the Bride’s poem was read out as a reading during the ceremony, or you could dedicate a favourite reading to them
- Locket on bouquet or photo charms – a bride at Lillibrooke recently had a little heart-shaped locket tied onto her bouquet, with a picture of her Grandparents in it, so that she felt they were with her during an important part of the wedding day
- One Bride had a garter made from a piece of lace from her Grandmother’s wedding dress, which was a lovely way to ensure her Grandmother was an important part of the day!
- Another Bride, who had lost her Mother, incorporated her favourite flower in the bouquets and floral displays
- Picture on top table or have a photo table – you could place a photo in a frame of a loved one on top table, so that they can join in the festivities, or create a memory table with pictures of all those you wish could be with you
- Leave an empty chair at the ceremony or meal, or put a picture or flower on a chair
- Carry a family heirloom or wear a piece of jewellery – many Brides and Grooms choose to wear a piece of jewellery, or cufflinks, which used to belong to a loved one
- Light a candle in traditional remembrance of a lost loved one
- Dedicate favours to them – at Lillibrooke, we’ve had forget-me-not seed envelopes or donations to charity in remembrance – for example if they battled cancer, donate to Cancer Research
- If they had a favourite drink, have that as your reception drink, or cigars on the bar if they enjoyed the occasional one as a treat!
There are endless ways to celebrate the life of a lost loved one, but it should mean something to you and have a basis in the relationship you shared with that person and also be fitting to your wedding and how public or private you want to make it. No matter how you choose to do it, it will mean that they are with you in memory to share in your most important day and to play a special part in supporting you in an emotional time.
Ilaria Petrucci Photography & Charlotte Alberto
Blogger & Events Manager
Having worked in London for most of her career, Alys discovered & fell in love with Lillibrooke Manor in 2012 and has never looked back, delivering hundreds of events and ensuring that each one is special and perfect in every way